My Rituals have Shriveled
a poem for fall's descent/veils thinning
My rituals have shriveled
here now
Alone
without you
Has it really come to only this?
socked feet to stand outside
Bathing in this fat pearl of smiling moon
the cold of August in Cascadia
a smile of thanks
my prayers in minds eye only
quiet beneath the wide open sky
so then it’s
back a house
the dull man made warmth
frum goes the refrigerator
Hmmmmm goes my ears
Thumb thumb goes the hip hop upstairs
and a car rasppssss across the valley
What about the time we stood on the deck
singing to frogs and the full moon
a quaking messy melodious mix
of all our voice
I turn on the TV
as I have done now
hour after hour after hour
for so many years now
we don’t talk anymore
long gone
the monthly Sundays
when we gathered to kiss
trees blindfolded
meditate in January’s
blanket dark, harmonizing our chants
for a chance to end to Trump
a return to some shard of sane guidance
How she gathered the wood
to make the fire
that small bundle cradled in her arms
we stood
eyes downcast
mesmerized
as the first lick toold hold
a tiny sliver of cedar kindly quickly
sparked its kin and before long
a luscious comforting roar
to warm our bones
My rituals have shriveled now
that you’re gone
The Bic lighter burrs
against my thumb, a single candle
flames &
I’m alone
again
moon huge
full of Opal
Old dreams &
promises